My Twentysomething Life

I Do, Make, Read, Watch, Eat…

About Goals

I have always been a goal setter.  I have always been excited about goals and work really hard to achieve them.  I always thought that goals were helpful and made me better, until recently that is.  As I looked back over my 23 goals for my 23rd year as well as my progress on my new years’ resolutions, I am starting to think that goals do not serve me well.  All they do is frustrate me and make me feel like I failed when I don’t reach them.  I crossed off many of my 23 goals for last year, but thinking over the ones that I didn’t mark off really made me feel bad, and I don’t think that is what goals are supposed to do.

I set a lot of daily goals for my new years’ resolutions and I do not think that I have done all of them for one day yet.  Daily goals are hard because you never know what a day is going to hold.  Having daily goals can limit your flexibility and who knows what you will miss out on if you are too rigidly focused on meeting those goals at the expense of everything else.  I set my new years’ resolutions to get in a routine that I thought would make me happier, but really having these new years’ resolutions hanging over my head has just made me unhappy.  It has turned blogging into a chore.  It has turned reading my Bible into something I do to get it checked off for the day.  Those are not good things.  So maybe goal setting just isn’t for me.

What if I just try to live every day to be the best me that I can be?  What would that look like?  One goal that I have already struggled with this year is my goal to get more healthy.  The reason that I set this goal is because I have put on 10 pounds since I got married, all in my belly, and I just don’t like it.  I have found that because I set a goal to eat more healthily, exercise, and ultimately lose weight, I am paying more attention to that weight and ultimately feeling worse about myself.  That is not at all what I wanted!  Goals draw attention to and make me dwell on the things that I most want to change about myself, but that is not necessarily a good thing to dwell on daily.  Who wants the things that they don’t like about themselves on their mind every day?

Do I want to read my Bible every day?  Do I want to lose some weight?  Do I want to keep the house clean every day?  Yes!  But it is not what I need to spend every day dwelling on and feel bad about it if I do not meet my goals.  So how can I make progress and do better without having a daily goal to measure myself against?

I need to filter my day though God’s words and let him be my checkpoint.

Colossians 3:23-24
Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward.  You are serving the Lord Christ.

Proverbs 31:10
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Matthew 22:37-40
And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”

Philippians 4:8
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

1 Peter 3:4
But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God?  You are not your own, for you were bought with a price.  So glorify God in your body.

 

I’m deleting my goals.  I’m not going to dwell on them any longer.  Instead, I am going to put Bible verses around my house to remind me that I am not my own.  I have no goals of my own.  God’s goals are my goals.

 

 

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The Long and Short of It

I have this thing with my hair.  When it’s long I (think I) want it short.  And when it’s short I really want it to be long.  This has been going on my whole life, but here are a few more recent examples:
My hair when I started college:
collegeLong, wavy, I actually really liked it there.  Then it was dyed red, and then black, and really kept the length.  And then this happened.  A big time cut an dye job.
college2I was actually really sad when it got cut this short, but through everything I always try to tell myself that it’s just hair and it will grow back.  Well, sometimes it just takes a really long time to grow back.
I had finally grown out my hair and had these weird bleach spots in it (I’m sure you’ve seen those pictures) when my friend was going to get married, so my parents paid to have the color fixed and the unhealthy ends were cut off, so it was back to short.
college3This photo was in the summer of 2009.  I grew my hair out from here, with only trims, until my wedding in August 2011.  This is a picture of how long it was on the honeymoon.
honeymoon1I loved it this length, but at the same time I was kinda sick of it, so what did I do?  Chopped it off.
honeymoon2I kept growing it out and that November I went to get a trim.  My hair was a little past my shoulders at that point.  I had let my bangs grow out for the most part.  Here is a picture of what I ended up with, and remember I asked for a trim:
yikesSo short!  You may not be able to see it very well, but my hair is near my chin and well I have bangs!  And this haircut was terrible.  The layers were just awful and it was so short!  This was December 2011.  I have been growing my hair out ever since then.  I’ve been really happy with it long and while I want to keep growing it out longer, I am also so tempted to chop it off!  It’s a little longer than it was when we got married, and it’s really low maintenance right now.
This weekend when my InStyle magazine came in the mail there were these gorgeous photos of Shailene Woodley with her hair chopped off, and that really made me itch to chop my hair off.  This is the cut that I love!
woodleyWhat do you think?
To cut or not to cut?
Could I pull off this haircut?

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Lately

I don’t know what the deal has been lately, but I just have not wanted to blog.  Like at all.  None of my “stuck” topics appeal to me, I’ve just had a major case of “I don’t want to write” lately.  I’m not sure if it’s been the crummy weather, or that I’ve been so busy, or that I’ve had a bunch of migraines this week.  It’s probably a combination of all those things.  I’m trying to get excited about writing again.  There are a couple things coming up that I’m pretty excited about.

Thursday 20th–I have still been battling being sick and migraines and just generally being exhausted all the time, so I’m switching doctors and my first appointment with this new doctor is Thursday, so hopefully I will start seeing some progress.
Saturday 22nd
–I’m going to the Associated Ladies of Milligan Conference.  I’m going with a friend that I haven’t spent time with in forever, so I’m really looking forward to that, and the speaker is supposed to be really great.
Sunday 23rd–I picked out a movie that I specifically want Amanda and Adam to see, so we are going to be viewing “The Hudsucker Proxy” on Sunday afternoon.  I’m really excited and I hope they like it.
Tuesday 25th–My 24th birthday!  I don’t know why, but thinking about 24 seems really old.  And Rizzoli and Isles comes back!
Thursday 27th–Grey’s Anatomy is back!!
Sunday March 2nd–The Oscars!!
Friday March 21st–Divergent!  It’s almost here.

What are you looking forward to in the next month?

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Pictures and Stories

I’m linking up again this week with The Girl Between the Lines.  I found today’s prompt to be very difficult for me.  The prompt is: “Share one of your favorite photos and the story behind it.”  Well, asking me to pick out a favorite picture is just way to hard, and especially one with a story.

One of my favorite parts of organizing these family photos into albums recently is remembering my childhood.  Adam and I were looking through the albums the other day and I was telling him stories behind the pictures.  Sometimes my favorite pictures don’t really have stories behind them, they were just taken of life happening, and sometimes that’s the best of all.

I have picked out a few of my favorite pictures with stories to share with you because I couldn’t pick just one.

189050_1005051283729_5811_nThis picture is from sometime in high school with some of my very good friends from church: Ellis and Lauren.  This picture was taken at our church’s trunk or treat.  We knew that we wanted to go, but we couldn’t figure out what to go as.  So we went as the easiest costume ever: hobos.  It was a very fun night, even though the kids were too afraid of us to come and get candy.
215365_20027731232_9691_nThis picture was at a cookout the summer between my sophomore and junior year of high school.  That was just a fun summer to begin with.  These are two of my best friends from high school and I remember that right before this picture was taken I had been choking on my hamburger and Kylee and Karie had just been laughing at me, and I had started laughing, making me choke more.  I just remember this summer and this party being full of laughter and that is what this picture reminds me of.
220172_10150245929916233_5731457_oThis is one of my favorite pictures ever of Adam and I.  He was such a good sport this day.  I wanted some pictures of us together, so we went out on this bright day and took pictures.  For this one I made him lay down on the soccer field with me, which he thought was stupid, but he was a good sport about it.  We took several pictures that day, but this one is my favorite, and is still a very favorite of both of us together.
319717_10150335082671703_7090787_nThis is me and Janna at the rehearsal for my wedding.  Janna has been my friend for as long as I can remember.  And we only lived close to each other for a small chunk of our lives, but somehow we have stayed friends, and I am so thankful for that.  Throughout our entire friendship we only had two fights.  One was a silly fight about a boy, and one was over this little purple guy.  Janna and I were little and at a garage sale.  We both found something that we wanted–Mr Fuzzy, who is holding a sign that says “Hang in there.”  My mom said Janna was the guest and so she got to keep it.  I was so mad.  A few years later I found out that my family was going to be moving away, I was devastated.  My going away present from Janna was the little purple guy.  Over the years whenever I would look at him on my shelf I would think of Janna and our friendship.  When I was trying to figure out what gifts I was going to give my bridesmaids, I knew that I was going to give the little guy back to Janna.  Who knows how many more times he’ll be passed along over the coming years, but that is one of my favorite stories behind a picture.  If you didn’t know the story behind this picture you would just think we holding some weird purple guy, but knowing the story makes it so much better-at least in my eyes.

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Happy Valentines Day!

Yes, I know that I’m a week early, but Adam and I are going to be celebrating today because my family will be here next week.
Some highlights for today:
–Monkey bread for breakfast
–Seeing “The Lego Movie” in theaters, because we are both super excited to see it!
–Eating a homemade steak dinner
–Enjoying some much needed time together

I won’t bore you with a bunch of mushy couple stuff–just know that I love my husband and I am so excited to spend the day with him!  And Happy Valentines Day to you and your sweetie because I will probably forget to wish it to you next week.

chickenhearts

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Snow Day! and a Link Up!

Good morning everyone, it is a beautiful snowy day here in Tennessee.  Yesterday my office closed at noon and today it is closed all day!  Today I’m going to be linking up with Lauren and Hayley and The Girl Between the Lines again.  I’m really excited about today’s prompt.

We all imagine what our lives would be like when we were “all grown up”…how does that compare to what your life looks like now?
mash-game
Everyone plans and dreams about the future.  I remember planning my future in a rather silly way when I was in elementary school.  I would gather around with a bunch of my friends on the bus or at recess, or during class when we weren’t supposed to, and play MASH.  Anyone else remember this game?  It was pretty complex and took a lot of time, but in the end, you would find out whether you would live in a Mansion, Apartment, on the Street, or in a House.  And you would know who you would share it with, how many kids you would have, pets, any number of things.  I know that my future was planned probably 100 different ways using the MASH technique.  Kids have all sorts of games like this that plague their time and thoughts.  We all want to dream about what our lives will look like in the future.

I have a book that I filled out when I was very little and one of the questions in it was, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”  Do you want to guess what I wrote?
A window washer.  What? Yeah, that’s what I said.  A window washer.  Yeah, I don’t know where that came from either.

Our plans and dreams for the future are vast and changing by the minute.  I know that over the course of my (so far rather short) life I have had many plans and dreams about my future.  And while some of them come true, I have found that most of my dreams and expectations have not come true, and that is not necessarily a bad thing.  Some of the things I thought I always wanted are not really what are important to me anymore, so I am glad that they did not come true.

Am I where I always planned and dreamed I would be?  No.
Am I thankful for where and I am and what my life looks like? Yes.
Do I sometimes get wrapped up in the dreams and plans that didn’t come true? Yes.
Would I want to change it?  Sometimes I get caught up in discontent and think that everything should be different, and the way that I want it, but at the same time I know that the reason I’m am where I am is because God has directed it and placed me here, and he must have a reason for that.  So while right now I may not have or be doing everything I thought I wanted, I am where God wants me, and maybe one day he’ll let me see some of my own dreams come true.  I’ll just have to wait and see.

I may not be a billionaire window washer who lives in a Mansion with 5 kids, a red convertible, a basketball player husband, and a pet penguin, but I am a very blessed financial aid counselor, who has a roof over her head, a car that runs, an all star husband, with the promise of an amazing future, and an awesome God.  What more could I want?

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When I’m Sick

I hope you do not feel like I’m whining with all the talk of my being sick.  But I feel like I am sick all the time! 
I figured that since I am sick, what feels like all the time, I would let you know what happens when I am sick.

I sleep, all the time, and never feel like I have rested.
I lay on the couch, drink water, and eat oyster crackers.
I don’t do any housework.
I blow my nose so much that it becomes painful.
I watch the clock for when I can take more medicine.
My shoulder starts to hurt because I’m most comfortable laying on that side of my body.

And this has been going on for 2.5 weeks now.  So that means: there’s no food in the house, the house is a mess, I’m still worn out and want to sleep, but I need the money so I’m blowing my nose raw at work.  And it also means that this week I’m going to find a new doctor.  Hopefully the tides will turn and I’ll start feeling better.  I hope you all are healthy, rested, and that your homes are clean.

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You’re Probably Wondering

You’re probably wondering where I’ve been.
Well, I’ve been pretty busy at work with school starting and also with being sick.
I have been sick for two weeks now and I’m tired of it.  I am just worn out all the time.
Hopefully with this three day weekend I’ll start getting to feeling better.
It’ll be a pretty busy three day weekend.  We have a lot of plans, but hopefully it will be relaxing at the same time.
I hope all of you have a good three day weekend!

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Looking Back-Our First Year of Marriage

Today we are going to be attending our first wedding of the year.  This is going to be a year full of weddings for us.  We have some really good friends getting married this year and we are so excited to celebrate with them.  And I am excited to be a bridesmaid in the wedding of one of my best friends!  Today, Adam’s cousin Whitney is getting married and we are so excited to be in Illinois celebrating with her.  Thinking about all the weddings coming up this year make me remember our wedding and recently our first year of marriage.  Looking back, our first year of marriage was pretty crazy.  Let me clue you in to all the crazy things that went on.

weddingFirst, we got married, August 6, 2011.  It was a wonderful day.  We have so many great memories from our wedding day, and it started the next year off right.
We went on about a week long honeymoon, which was amazing.  We went to Lake Geneva in Wisconsin and stayed in a cute little bed and breakfast and had an amazing steak dinner.
honeymoonI feel like we look so young here!  And we’re both so skinny!
After our honeymoon, we packed up our things and we moved into our apartment at Milligan.  During one of the first days of unpacking, Adam stuck his hand in an immersion blender, while it was running, to see how it worked.  That resulted in a trip to the emergency room and several stitches in his finger.  Here is a memorable Facebook post from my sister after this fun event:
fingerAfter the stitches incident, we started our Senior year at Milligan.  Both of us were taking a full load and sometime it felt like we hardly saw each other.  Then, at fall break, we went home to visit our families in Illinois.  On this visit, we hit a dear and really banged up our car.  Luckily, my parents let us borrow their van to go back to school while our car was getting fixed.  It was only a week or two later that we found out that Adam’s grandfather in Florida was not doing very well.  We traveled with the rest of his family down to Florida to see him one last time, and then he passed away.  We traveled the next weekend up to Illinois for the funeral.  The next few months were uneventful and then we had our first married Christmas together.  It was a good time.  And then we started our last semester back to school.  In March, my great-grandmother passed away, and we went to Indiana for the funeral.  It was good to be with the whole family and to celebrate my grandmother.  She was a wonderful person and I miss her.  Not long after that I hurt my shoulder playing basketball.
shoulderThis injury plagues me still today.  We now know that I have a torn tendon in my shoulder.  And this is where it all started.
Then, in May, this beard happened (thanks to no shave last semester) and we graduated from college.
graduationNot long after that, Adam applied and was accepted to Emmanuel, I accepted a job at the Johnson City Medical Center, we saw our best friends get married, and we moved across the street to a bigger apartment.

Adam loves the bigger space!

Adam loves the bigger space!

And then, we spent our first anniversary spending time with friends.

It was definitely a crazy first year of marriage, but it was also a great year of marriage.
To all our friends and loved ones getting married this year we wish you the best and we want you to know that we’re hear for you on this wild ride.

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Nap Time?

snoopyI am whiped out.  It has been one of those days.  I have been sick and have been at home the last two days sleeping.  Today I went back to work and even worked through lunch.  And now I am ready for a nap.  I could sleep just about anywhere.
nap timeBut I can’t take one because I have to go work at my part time job in 30 minutes.  Doesn’t it always happen that the days you want a nap the most  you don’t get one?  And the days where you don’t want to take a nap are the days where you have time for a nap.  So today, if you have time, take a nap for me, and know that I am jealous.  Happy Napping 🙂basset nap

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