I have always been a goal setter. I have always been excited about goals and work really hard to achieve them. I always thought that goals were helpful and made me better, until recently that is. As I looked back over my 23 goals for my 23rd year as well as my progress on my new years’ resolutions, I am starting to think that goals do not serve me well. All they do is frustrate me and make me feel like I failed when I don’t reach them. I crossed off many of my 23 goals for last year, but thinking over the ones that I didn’t mark off really made me feel bad, and I don’t think that is what goals are supposed to do.
I set a lot of daily goals for my new years’ resolutions and I do not think that I have done all of them for one day yet. Daily goals are hard because you never know what a day is going to hold. Having daily goals can limit your flexibility and who knows what you will miss out on if you are too rigidly focused on meeting those goals at the expense of everything else. I set my new years’ resolutions to get in a routine that I thought would make me happier, but really having these new years’ resolutions hanging over my head has just made me unhappy. It has turned blogging into a chore. It has turned reading my Bible into something I do to get it checked off for the day. Those are not good things. So maybe goal setting just isn’t for me.
What if I just try to live every day to be the best me that I can be? What would that look like? One goal that I have already struggled with this year is my goal to get more healthy. The reason that I set this goal is because I have put on 10 pounds since I got married, all in my belly, and I just don’t like it. I have found that because I set a goal to eat more healthily, exercise, and ultimately lose weight, I am paying more attention to that weight and ultimately feeling worse about myself. That is not at all what I wanted! Goals draw attention to and make me dwell on the things that I most want to change about myself, but that is not necessarily a good thing to dwell on daily. Who wants the things that they don’t like about themselves on their mind every day?
Do I want to read my Bible every day? Do I want to lose some weight? Do I want to keep the house clean every day? Yes! But it is not what I need to spend every day dwelling on and feel bad about it if I do not meet my goals. So how can I make progress and do better without having a daily goal to measure myself against?
I need to filter my day though God’s words and let him be my checkpoint.
Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
1 Peter 3:4
But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
I’m deleting my goals. I’m not going to dwell on them any longer. Instead, I am going to put Bible verses around my house to remind me that I am not my own. I have no goals of my own. God’s goals are my goals.